What are some of the most awkward things that you can remember form your childhood? I remember when I was a kid and my Mom asked me to go in the store to buy her maxi-pads. Yep, that’s what I said, maxi-pads (didn’t see that one coming, did ya? haha). Talk about embarrassing... it was sheer torture having to casually walk up to the counter to pay for feminine hygiene products as a young boy. It was the whole "placing them up next to the register to pay for them thing" and the look you'd get. And then it seemed like an eternity before the cashier would tuck them safely away in the bag so nobody else could see them. What’s up with that? Put it in the bag, Lady! At least when MJ has had me pick them up for her I could hide them in between a box of Fiddle Faddle and a couple bags of chips, but not Mom. She would only send me in for those and that’s it. No wonder I’m so messed-up. Thanks Mom. lol!
I’m gonna tell you a story that happened the other day and it was equally, if not more, awkward than that. Now this is kind of weird talking about this on my blog but it happened and we’re all adults so I had to tell you about it. Anyway, the other day MJ and I had to go to the pharmacy in the next town up from us (Quattro Barros) for some vitamin supplements for our youngest son, Robert. I still can’t speak Portuguese so I use the translator app on my i-phone for pretty much everything. I type in the sentence in English and then I hold the phone up so the person I’m trying to communicate with can read it translated into Portuguese (I love technology!). So MJ and I walked up to the pharmacy counter and I typed in “liquid magnesium” and then “zinc for our son.” They didn’t have it so I typed in why we needed it. They immediately went over to the shelf and brought back what they recommended as a substitute. Then we walked around the store a little and picked up a few more things since we were “in town.” While we were there I decided that I should probably buy some condoms because as awesome as having more kids would be (I’m sarcastically rolling my eyes right now) we don’t think we needed any more stress... I mean, blessings in our life. 8 kids is definitely enough right now. So to avoid the embarrassment of having to type in “I need some condoms” in my phone and then flash it to the pharmacist (who by the way is a female!) MJ and I scanned the entire store for them ourselves. We looked up and down every isle and you guessed it... no dice. So at this point MJ is already walking away from me as quickly as she can so that I don’t recruit her to go with me to the pharmacy counter and flash my phone to the lady. So I flew solo over to the pharmacist and I typed in the request and waited for a response. I could see the smirk emerge on her face as she tried not to laugh at me. Then I watched as she walked the length of the counter, then out from behind the counter, then to the front of the store (where we just looked ourselves) and pointed at the condom section. MJ came over and joined us as I was trying not to make eye contact with the lady. When we started to look at the selection we busted out laughing because rather then just being normal they were all flavors! It was like being at Baskin Robbins. Seriously. They had grape, strawberry, orange, they even had mint flavored ones! Is that even necessary? For real. There were so many to choose from so I chose Tutti Frutti. That’s them in the picture up top. And the reason we didn’t see them ourselves is because they were in packages that looked like cough drops. I’m not making this up: )
Back to the whole awkward thing. It was awkward having to ask someone for condoms. It’s even awkward talking about them here on a blog. Why is that though? MJ and I have been married for 22 years. We have children so we’ve obviously “been together.” We’re in love. Sex was created by God for married couples. So where does the whole awkward thing come from? I mean we’re inundated with sexuality everywhere all-the-time (in a negative way) but for a christian man who loves and desires his wife to talk about his sexuality it’s awkward. Why? Some people may have even gotten offended that I even mentioned the word condom. Why is that? We need to change that line of thinking. God created sex not the devil. But what the devil’s done is pervert it, so that not only is sex outside of marriage a major issue in our culture, but he’s got all the christians afraid to talk about it... like sex was his idea! Ha!
Sex is good... inside the marriage relationship. It’s not dirty and God created it to be enjoyed... inside of marriage. And if you’ve never talked to your teenager (or tweenager) about it, go ahead and talk to them. It’ll be worth the awkwardness to have the discussion.
When I started typing today I had no idea that I was going to say all that but there ya go. Hopefully it wasn’t too awkward : )
Love Ya,
Jim
PS - If you have teens or pre-teens here’s an article for you. This guy is also a great source for people who minister to (or have) teens. Click HERE
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